White house serves “Guinness from hell” to sour Irish relations

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White house serves “Guinness from hell” to sour Irish relations

Whitehouse officials are scrambling to repair US-Irish relations following the now infamous ‘Guinness-gate’ incident. Guinness occurred on what has been described by insiders as a St Patrick’s Day “horror show” at the Whitehouse.

The trouble began when Vice President Mike Pence addressed the travelling Irish contingent with the salutation ‘Top o’ the Morning” – a much derided salutation by Irish nationals and considered by cultural experts as sham-Irish or evidence of “Paddy-whackery”.

 Not such a charm

According to an anonymous Irish diplomat the phrase made a mockery of Irish cultural sensitivities.

“’Top o’ the morning’ hasn’t been used since Tom Cruise said it to Nicole Kidman in ‘Far and Away’. Pence might as well of demanded Enda Kenny show him his pot of gold.”

To make matters worse, it appears the phrase entered the American consciousness through the ‘Lucky Charms’ Leprechaun from American television ads, which many Irish consider an offensive national stereotype.

Pint from hell

If all that wasn’t bad enough for Irish-US relations, Republican house speaker, Paul Ryan then toasted the Irish travelling party with what has been described as “the worst pint of Guinness imaginable”.

The owner of the ‘Dead Poet’ bar in Dublin offered his criticism on Ryan’s ill-formed stout:

“It was the kind of Guinness you find left in smoking section at the end of the night or the one you fish from behind the couch after staying up all night to watch a Las Vegas boxing match. It was just missing a floating decayed cigarette butt.

“It was the pint from hell.”

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